We’re all looking for (or hoping for) that perfect relationship. When you have finally found the “one,” you also want to make sure it lasts. But not even the perfect partnership can endure the test of time without a few good habits – and just about everyone has their own idea of exactly what “healthy” means. Take these five relationship habits, for example – they’re often pinned as as toxic, yet that isn’t quite the whole truth.
Agree to Disagree
No two people are going to view the world in exactly the same way, so you shouldn’t expect to agree on every little issue with your partner. While many believe couples should never disagree on anything, that can open some up to unnecessary fights with no resolution in sight. Instead, agree to disagree on the little things. Sometimes, it’s worth it to take one for the team.
Be (Sensibly) Honest
Even little white lies can leave lasting damage. It’s important that you and your partner help to make one another the best versions of you possible. This means raising one another up when the need arises—but it also means being willing to reality-check with absolute honesty. Call each other out on the little things that do matter, but don’t nitpick the small stuff. You’ll grow as a couple and as individuals.
Don’t Invest Your Whole Self
Your relationship should be at the top of your priority list—right below you. While people often say you need to invest your whole self into a relationship, that can be incredibly damaging to your sense of self.
Don’t sacrifice who you are in order to make things work. And never let go of your ideals for another person. If he truly is Mr. Right, your sense of self will remain intact, your self-esteem will only increase, and you’ll value both the time you spend together and the time you spend apart.
Ignore Occasional “Wandering Eyes”
A healthy relationship comes with the understanding that we’re sexual beings, and sometimes we might be attracted to other people. Healthy couples understand that it’s okay to look at the menu as long as that’s as far as it goes. Problems arise when people allow emotions to take hold prematurely, let jealousy interfere where it’s not warranted, or act on impulses due to other underlying issues.
Nobody’s perfect, and expecting your partner to be only opens you up for failure. You make mistakes, and so does your partner. That’s how you learn and grow. By being willing to accept one another’s faults, you accept that you will also disappoint one another sometimes, and that’s okay. You’re in this together, two beautifully flawed human beings. And what could be more perfect than that?