A Letter To My Daughters…

A Letter To My Daughters...
A Letter To My Daughters...

Part Two

If it belongs in a tackle box don’t put in or on your body.

Call me “old fashioned” but belly rings and odd piercings are permanent. Don’t mess up a masterpiece in a drunken stupor or succumb to the latest fad or worse yet, peer pressure. Step away from the tackle box. I am all for creativity and self-expression but think it through before it’s sunk in and you are wearing that “fad” forever. And a note for moms trying to keep up with the daughters… trying to keep up with those fads make you look really ridiculous.

Speak well and mind your manners.

Don’t ever answer with a “ya”, “my bad”, “um, like, for sure” or I will slap you in the forehead wherever you may be in the world. If you want people to take you seriously, speak well. Always use good manners. Don’t interrupt people. It’s just like tripping someone physically. Let them say what they originally wanted to say without you finishing a sentence for them. You might be surprised how much more a person will share if you are not speaking over them and for them. Be a good listener and you will be surprised at what you will hear if you listen before speaking.

Be an excellent tipper, be generous, be kind. Always, always, always send a thank you note. If someone took the time to pick out a gift, make or do something thoughtful for you, invited you to a really fun party; please don’t let that go unappreciated. Appreciate with appropriate thanks, preferably in writing or a heartfelt message.

And on the subject of manners, be a gracious loser. You will not win every battle in your life, every sporting game, or every match of wits. When you lose, hold your head high, shake that persons’ hand and give them a heartfelt congratulations, good game, nice move, boy, you really got me, good one, and good for you – and not with a smirk, or a tone that is not lovely and true. The person that walks away in a huff, yelling profanities or making excuses has just lost twice (and looks like that horrible warning you will find me pointing out of a crowd every time.) I have heard the saying when you lose, say little. When you win, say even less. Don’t you ever be the mean girl, I will hunt you down. There is no room in this world for mean. Life is hard enough. Girls you have to stick together and back each other up and nobody really ever knows what is going on in someone elses world.

You are responsible for yourself.

Not your sister, not your brother or your mother or your friend. This is your life and it flies by really fast so don’t blame anyone but yourself for anything, ever, period. Anyone can serve as a horrible warning or a beacon of light. Don’t compare yourself. Each person is here to do something unique. Find out what that is for you and get it done. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself about anything, ever. I promise you someone else would be so happy to change places with you right now. Stop procrastinating. It will take you less time to get it done than it will to worry about it because when you are done worrying, you will still have to handle it so just handle it now. Another one of my favorite quotes from John Wayne, “Life’s hard. It’s even harder when you’re stupid.” So, make good choices and own them.

Don’t judge people.

Life is hard enough, and people are going through all kinds of struggles. If someone is weird, mean, rude, just keep moving, things are probably not going their way. Just remember what other people think of you is their business – not yours so save yourself some heartache and don’t waste any time over that one. People are entitled to their own opinions. Your brother is right – those grades were really just “the teachers opinion of his work” however, getting a 4.0 GPA will serve you well and open many doors. Use your brain.

You may be your daddy’s “little princess” but in real life kick ass.

Be strong. You should be the person other people come to and ask for your help because you are smart, a self-starter, a quick thinker and you don’t mind getting your hands dirty. You need to be able to start a fire with a toothpick, shoot a gun, pump your own gas, make a meal out of anything and back up a boat trailer. You must be in good shape, take care of yourself and have a few McGyver survival tricks up your sleeve. These are a few “must have items” in your cute purse. (lip gloss, superglue, floss, a swiss army knife, zip ties, and a lighter (you really didn’t think you could start a fire with a toothpick).

The “damsel in distress” in the cartoons is not going to cut it in real life. So, daddy’s little princess, don’t sit down on a park bench waiting for Prince Charming to ride up and save you. If you don’t know how to do something, well, figure it out. Ask questions, read a book, better yet, help out, help others out. And hell yes, you can do all of this in a skirt because one of the most important things about being a girl is being feminine. Know what you want and use your power for good. Don’t expect a man to be like your girlfriend. Men and women are different for perfect reasons.

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VIAShelleen Valenty