Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone in the world could just agree on everything? It sure would make some things easier, but we all have different perspectives that can clash and bring out our harsher sides. There’s nothing wrong with having a disagreement, but learning to communicate gracefully will help you to keep your disagreements civil. These tips can help you avoid bad conflict so that no one has to walk away angry.
A source of many arguments is miscommunication. Have something to say to someone? Be sure that you try to clearly communicate your thoughts or feelings so that they understand you. Similarly, you should listen carefully and make sure you understand them when they speak. This can help you to be better at avoiding misunderstandings and help them feel like they’re being heard, too.
Placing blame tends to put people on the defensive, which can often make a small conflict bigger. If you’re upset about something someone’s done or by the way they’ve acted, start by saying, “I feel this way,” rather than, “You always do this.” Talking about you, your feelings and what is on you shows grace on your part — without further hurting feelings or pointing a finger.
Keep Your Voice Calm
A key method of avoiding unnecessary confrontation is to stay relaxed and keep your voice low. Yelling often makes others defensive, but if you keep it conversational, the other person is more likely to respond to that positively, even during a disagreement. Try to stay calm, even if the other person is unable to.
Be Open to Compromise
While you can’t always fully get your way in a relationship, you may often get at least part of it if you’re willing to compromise. If you and someone in your life need to make a decision that’s going to affect you both, but you can’t agree on what’s best, talking about why it’s important to each of you may help you to find a common middle ground.
Agree to Disagree
Do you and a friend have differing viewpoints on a subject? Can you still have that bond without those differing viewpoints affecting either of you? Sometimes it’s best to just agree to disagree and move on. Your relationship is more important than your argument. Diverse views are cool. You can learn from one another.
We can’t always avoid disagreement, but we can avoid a big mess by choosing how to deal with it. By trying to be understanding of others and accepting that we’re all unique in our thoughts and views, you can help keep your relationships pleasant and open.